Turn Up The AC

Misunderstanding

January 20, 2021 AC Fischer, Alexis Arralynn Season 1 Episode 59
Turn Up The AC
Misunderstanding
Chapters
Turn Up The AC
Misunderstanding
Jan 20, 2021 Season 1 Episode 59
AC Fischer, Alexis Arralynn

 “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

― George Bernard Shaw...

There is a lot of room for us to misunderstand each other. As frustrating as it can be, there are things we can do about it. AC Explores some of these...

Special thanks to Alexis Arralynn...

Be sure to check out my other podcast When The Bough Breaks...

If you'd like to record your own episode of Turn Up The AC, send me an email to find out how [email protected]





Support the show (https://www.buymeacoffee.com/acfischerpod)

Show Notes Transcript

 “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

― George Bernard Shaw...

There is a lot of room for us to misunderstand each other. As frustrating as it can be, there are things we can do about it. AC Explores some of these...

Special thanks to Alexis Arralynn...

Be sure to check out my other podcast When The Bough Breaks...

If you'd like to record your own episode of Turn Up The AC, send me an email to find out how [email protected]





Support the show (https://www.buymeacoffee.com/acfischerpod)

 “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

― George Bernard Shaw

A recent fight has left me thinking about how much simple misunderstandings can cause situations to escalate in unwanted, unexpected, and unnecessary ways.

Even as I say that, I realize that I’ve left a lot of room for misunderstanding. Was that intentional? Whatever I say to that point, you’re going to have your own conclusions that I can only minimally influence. Some of you are waiting for me to explain. Others are already clear on what I’m saying. Those who are clear are somewhere on the spectrum between right and wrong.

Isn’t this fun?

I don’t like to be misunderstood. I don’t like to be dismissed. I don’t like it when people make assumptions about me. I don’t like the phrase “it’s not what you said, it’s how you said it.”

I’ve often said that good communication relies on three factors. Of course my words and my tone are going to carry a lot of weight. The thing is that how you interpret those is just as important. I’m not trying to put your interpretation entirely on you but I’m not going to let you off the hook either.

At the beginning, I mentioned a recent fight. Did you know what I meant by “recent” or “fight?” Your interpretation of these words framed the rest of the sentence. There’s a potential misunderstanding right there.

We all have ideas about what certain words mean. The problem is that most of us aren’t deferring to a standard dictionary definition when we’re having a conversation – especially if that conversation is heated! 

When I hear something, I can’t help but default to the idea that familiar words can be safely interpreted according to the way I’ve seen them defined or how I would choose to use them. Too often, though, I miss the point of what I’m hearing because another person uses a word differently, or is working off of a different dictionary definition, cultural context, or something else.

I hate it when it’s done to me, yet I involuntarily do it to other people sometimes too! I hate that. I really do.

When I’m feeling calm, it’s really easy to ask someone a question like “what do you mean by that?” I see the frustration it causes but I think that this frustration is preferable to what happens when I don’t make this effort to understand.

I guess if there’s a point to all of this, it’s that I’m going to try to do a better job of understanding the people I communicate with. I hope that they appreciate the effort. More than that, I hope they make the same effort with me.

I’m tired of the misunderstanding. I’m tired of assumptions. I’m tired of arguing when we could be enjoying the simple pleasure of just knowing each other.